bitter and twisted

i shouldn't be this twisted... surely not

One to One.... (Joe Jackson song)

So tonight i'm going to just type with nothing in mind. i do my best thinking when i do it this way.

Last night i went to bed with a headache and then woke up with one this morning, the little fucker wont go away. I get migranes all the time, they are set off by high-pitched noises such as beeping, some instruments distorted on cds stuff like that. bloody annoying really. so I've been yawning and ouching all day.

i just got told by one of my friends that i'm an angel.. i think shes delusional. but i love her to bits anyway.

looks like i'm heading to perth for xmas. i'm slightly pissed off about something relating to that, but i will finally get to meet one of my best ever friends so i'm happy about that.

you know those people who walk really slow when you need to get somewhere fast?
and those people who stop in the MIDDLE of the footpath?
i want to slap them all in the back of their heads. i live in a CITY, when i moved here i assumed everyone walked fast, but fuck no! they walk as slow as FREAKING possible. Why is it also, that when i'm late i get the slowest drivers of public transport ever? they all go about 5 freaking centimeters per hour! Grrr......

and thats the end of this randomness.

blood and guts

I will .....

i just confessed a lot of things i've been hauling around in my brain for awhile and now it is time to let them go.

1. Instead of being surprised when he says he loves me, i'll be grateful and say it back, while letting him see my feelings in my eyes.

2. i will smile when all i want to do is cry

3. i will not take anything for granted, least of all my friends and my money

4. I will tell my mother i love her, even when i'm angry at her

5. I will take all that comes my way and deal with it myself, it wont kill me it will make me stronger

6. i will treat myself to something i enjoy just because i can

7. I will love myself as much as i can

8. I will smile at least 3 times a day

9. i will do something i enjoy daily

10. I will stress less and love more


so tomorrow, i will be going for a walk at southbank because i enjoy it there, i will be talking to my man and telling him i appreciate him and love him, i will call my mum on sunday and tell her i love her, and i will smile lots at life :)

Heres a smile for you... :D

Exams and Life...

i looked across the room and watched others
scribble loudly on their pages
i looked down at mine
flipped to an easier question
my mind went numb
when did i learn this?
more to the point,
when did i forget it?


i dont know what i've done in my exams.

i did my sociology one, i thought i did good, but others told me they didnt finish the exam, yet i got mine all done and left early... so i dont know how i did.

Then came Literature...
Essays arent my strong point. Ask me to have an opinion verbally and i can make you understand, ask me to write it down in an hour and i fail miserably. i had to write two essays in two hours on texts i had read over this year (not as easy as it sounds) the catch is, we get three passages from the texts to write about. i think i did okay, not great, just okay.

then came work...
lets just say i expected innapropriate comments from the factory workers, not the guy who is essentially the team leader. needless to say, i'm not staying in this job long....

next exam is on tuesday, so i get monday and tuesday off work (thank god)

so lets talk about life shall we?

I might not be seeing my man at all this weekend, and I'm worried because most times when he does work weekends and doesnt sleep well he gets really sick. i reminded him to eat at regular times and i hope he gets sleep tonight. normally i dont worry because he gets to be at home working, not out in the field.

I really miss my school friends. i dont get to see them as often and i dont want to lose them. I'm heading home to mums soon, she wanted me to come home for xmas, so i'm dragging my man with me (4 hour train ride) that will be probably on the 5th of december... maybe.

But yesterday... i fell up an escalator... it wasnt going fast enough for me (yeah i am that weird.)

how was your week?